Sunday, March 6, 2011

paDANG, that is a sweet earth.


its already happening.... the time warp.

brent called me this morning and asked me to run up to his room and look in his emails for the flight info of the guest he has coming in today... i got it and read it off to him...
flight 74 on sriwijaya air or whatever.
through the phone, i heard him getting so irritated on the other side... heatedly saying things in indonesian to the airport people.

and then i looked again, and had the following convo:
me: "uh.. brent. he gets in on tuesday the 8th. today is monday."
B: "no zani. it's tuesday. its the 8th today."
me: "really? no... i think its monday."
B: "are you sure??"
me: "uhh.. i mean, no. but let me ask bridgette."
me: "ya. its totally monday."
B: "oh.... well, shit."

time just doesn't exist.

we walked to get lunch when he got back from his airport adventure...

i think padang is beautiful and exotic.

brent thinks its a shit hole.

i see beautiful vibrant colors and rich life here.

brent sees polluted water and poverty.

it's kind of on par with the conversation i had with shawn hanna before i left

we went for a wander through venice on a freezing evening... down the windy, deserted boardwalk and found ourselves at vardos.
we sat at a little table by the window for a good 2+ hours sipping on macadamia nut dirty chais and sharing a seemingly never-ending bowl of coconut gypsy soup.

how fortuitous and symbolic that meal unknowingly was... gypsies, coconuts, and chai are basically the recurring themes of my life right now.
and, of course, rose quartz.

shawn was feeling uninspired artistically, so i suggested we play a game where we make 30-second drawings at the table... whatever comes to mind when i say a word.
i grabbed some little brown bev naps, shuffled around the mugs and bowls on our table and we went to town.
i found the very napkins we drew on in my wallet on the plane ride from batam to padang yesterday.

this is what he drew when i said
30 seconds - draw "MUSIC":
i see a guy holding his guitar, standing on the edge of a cliff crying out his music to the sky above some crashing ocean waves that happen to look like people arching their backs, presenting their hearts to the heavens... posieden, much?

ya.i know.
don't even...
i love this man.

as we talked that night, he called me out for being an eternal optimist. and i've heard it before...
i am.
i'm totally a light chaser...
a sun seeker...

but i'm not trying to pretend like there isn't a dark side.
everything has a shadow. every day turns into night.
and leanne told me one time "there's a reason we can't stay in the direct sunlight at all times. we would literally FRY and burn out. we need that cooling, calming, nighttime, and moonlight time to rest and be reflective."

i get that.

but at the same time...
gibran said "you see but your shadow when you turn your back to the sun..."

so i face it and i chase it. and i am A.O.K. with that.

i don't just see the cup half full... i see it as potentially being able to be transfered to a smaller cup and thereby becoming TOTALLY full... overflowing even.

who the hell cares?

what if we only get this ONE chance in life?
what if this is our last lifetime?

you're really NOT gonna tell someone you love them cuz it might get "weird"??

you're really gonna consciously choose to be dark and sad and dwell on the past, while the present slips through your fingertips?

what. ever.

i'm not saying 'don't cry.' .... cuz lord knows i been having some good ones lately.
being sad is awesome...
but like my magically brilliant friend, colin dieden says,
"if you laugh at all the things that make you sad... you won't be sad anymore."
(peep... listen... learn... L☮VE...)

i love this reflection connection friendship.
i love this picture.
i love the goddess who took it.
i love this manifestival & the collective of spirits who threw it.
i love this bedspread we're sitting on that is now the OM hOMe native-american-inspired-room's curtain.
i love the period of my life captured in this photo.

the summer of L☮VE in venice...

i got my L☮VE tattoo this night.

its weird when you leave something you love.
but i did it in my marriage
i did it with my bay street apartment
i did it with venice & the om home
i did it with my job at yogitoes
...and i guess i'll probably continue to do it throughout my life.

but like i always say... this universe is abundant... it is a gift-giving earth.
and you can't GIVE to a closed palm.

soo... we surrender. and let go. and open our arms... and wait for the next thing that's gonna be so amazing we won't want to give it up.

Ainsley texted me this morning, which made me smile so big.

not only do i have a phone number that my friends have...
but i can TEXT with AINSLEY!
you know... my friend Ainsley who lives on that island way out in the middle of the indian ocean that i am going to...
that's really cool.

she texted me "go meet my friend christina. there's only 5 white girls here... good to meet them."

brent said "there's FIVE!? who else is there?"

its not even a joke.

i was trying to text back as we walked (walking quickly of course, as me and B do...) and within 5 minutes, almost got hit by three motorbikes and a car, and nearly fell in a pothole the size of a bathtub.
So i had to stand still to text back that YES! i would LOVE to meet another white girl!
and just standing there for 2 minutes, i probably had 30 cars honk and guys hanging out of buses saying hello to me.
i ALWAYS say hello back.

2 guys at a fruit stand across the street called out to me to take their picture.


i met Lia and Ayen today...

Ayen is the one who booked my flight and was gonna pick me up from the airport but got misinformed that i missed my flight.
she's adorable.

Lia is equally adorable. all smiles. i want to wrap my arms around her and hug her, like abby.
she works with Ainsley and took my passport to keep in Padang so we can request an extension in May.
and she is helping to figure out how to get me to the island.

I was maybe gonna get on this tiny plane tomorrow... but i have to be there at 7am and can only take 10kilos of luggage.
so, that is not happening.

but also... i'm just liking having the time to hang with brent and absorb padang right now.

the next flight is on friday, so if brent's boat isn't ready i will get on that flight and send my stuff on the boat.

either way i will be on the island (finally) by friday.

i kind of want to explore padang more.

i am going to meet christina (this famous white girl) tonight... well, i mean, i don't have plans to do it or anything... im just gonna show up.

i am so down with this way of meeting up with people. its just as effective to let meetings happen organically and synchronistically.
we just get totally caught up in technology and immediacy... as though our very lives depend on it.

such BS.

did you know, that you can NEVER GO TOO SLOW?

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