TonsAI YAI YAI I love this place!!!!

I am on an airplane again...
I realized that since I arrived in southeast asia nearly 7 months ago I have been on somewhere around 15 planes, well over 100 longboats, canoes and ferry boats... And of course the hundreds of nautical miles I clocked on brentie's dearly departed speedboat "nyangnyang hujan"... Which means 'singing in the rain'

I was singing in the rain this morning as Laura, Cary and I departed the magical village we has literally stumbled into yesterday.. It's called Tonsai.
Before we knew it we were very unwillingly departing after not nearly enough time in this hippie vibe Venice-esque secret rock climbing haven you literally have to scale a gnarly cliff and rock climb (which I later did barefoot of course)... To find this little gem of a village.

We had arrived in Krabi by ferry and upon meeting a French guy with a blue scarf, bright eyes and a fortuitous name.. I made an executive decision that we'd follow the frenchies and dive into their longboat heading wherever they were going.
I was exhilarated!
I yelped over the hum of the loud motor and smacked my hand on the wood planks of the buzzing thai canoe "this!!!! This is adventure!!! This is traveling!"
Laura and Cary laughed and looked slightly terrified and excited at the same time.

By some synchronistic twist of luck, we ended up in Raily Beach, which Captain Gina had scribbled a map in the back of my weMoon diary back in Phuket.

It said "Tonsai- steep climb"

We walked to the other side of Railey beach, past howling monkeys and beautiful cliff faces, and found it. Steep climb indeed.
Together with all our stuff (and mind you Laura and I share a problem called overpacking like whoa)... So ya.
Lightpacker/athlete of the century Cary carried half my stuff and seemed to skip over the cliff.
I gotta say it was seriously one of the more challenging physical experiences of my entire life.... Or at least in a very long time.

When Laura and I finally crossed the threshold out of the jungle and slippery rocks and started our descent towards this Mecca which we could now wee below us...  We all immediately understood why we were here as we felt the familiar recognizable energy....
It felt like a big sur topanga canyon air.  

We checked into our little rugged hut that reminded us all of sleep-away camp.

The Rastafarian Thai bartender named Tafee bubbled with joy when he talked and answered each and every question "why not!?"

I approached the Open air bar and asked if it would be alright to get three tequila soda limes to take back across the footpath to where the three of us were sitting devouring the most delicious green curry and the essence of one another....
"why not!?" tafee cried turning his hands upwards towards the incredible woven vines and pieces of gnarled branches hanging from the ceiling and down in front g the giant bob marley tapestry.
"I don't know!" I replied playing along joyfully.
"why not!?" he howled again.
"I deliver to you! American beauty and friends!"
"really!?" I exclaimed!
"why not!?" we both said and laughed.

Ten minutes later tafee came dancing up to our dinner table with beautiful glasses garnished with sweet pineapple slices and lotus flowers.

After we ate and drank under the light of the moon which was bouncing off the cliff face that hung able our heads resembling petrified dripcastles I used to make as a child on Carmel beach as my mother would twirl through the tidepools and tell us for the ten thousanth time how she almost became a marine biologist but chose to dance instead.

The fog seemed to twirl and dance around the dramatic cliffs and bays of Tonsai as our longtail boat pulled out and back towards Krabi far far far too soon.

That morning a rock climber who walked as though it was a second home, sported a shirt that said 
"I'm leaving Tonsai TOMMORROW!!!"
And on the back it said sheepishly smaller
... Maybe

I can see how this place swallows you and makes you never want to leave... That is... If YOU are one of US....

In Krabi, I checked my email and found a letter from my mother telling me about an artist she met in San Diego by chance.
He's an eccentric, wonderful, creative soul who not only offers to mentor my mom (a fairly new but phenomenally talented water color painter)... But she also has agreed to work with him in an altruistic endeavor to paint at the hospital with sick children.

I wrote her back, my heart nearly heaving with joy. How beautiful my mom found one of her people so quickly.

My parents spent the last few years in Moraga, Calfornia- on the 6th fairway of a private golf course county club. The air was thick with conservative, balding rich white republicans and my mom was literally short of breath the entire time. Her blood pressure rose.. Her sinuses shut down...
She lost her balance.

I know what that's like.

I too, need MY people... The people who go to Tonsai and rock climb and sit in tafee's bar and then retire to a rustic cabin early so they can be up for the magic of dawn.

Not the twenty somethings that invade Ko phangang and drunkenly dance to lady gaga with a bucket of vodka redbull in hand and wake up and noon in agony with the taste of vomit on their lips.

I say this and make it sound awful- but trust me it is fun. I recognize it. Partying is fun!
Just like my mom recognized that her golf course pear orchard valley home was beautiful... But at the end of the day... We are not able to balance the world when we are the only ones awake on the other side feeling suffocated by sleeping souls...

I need hippies.
I need awake, conscious, digging for deeper meaning in everything, yogis.
I need rock climbers and adventurers and shell collectors.
I need creators and writers.... Painters and poets...
I need witty, intelligent thinkers...
I need datenights that include raw foods and macadamia nut milk chai lathes and barefoot beach walks under the full moon.
I need deep breathers so that I can breathe deep too.

I need my breath to be deep so my thoughts can be light.

-------------
Bangkok

We checked into the Dang Derm Hotel on Khaosahn Road. The same place Jessica and I stayed earlier in the month.
It's reasonable, central, clean, big comfy beds, hot showers and has a rooftop pool.

All 3 of us slept in the king sized bed like we did in Bali too (me in the middle of course)
I love sitting 'bitch' in the car... I love being squished between love- for as long as I candelabra I've loved being squeezed between the mattress and a wall or in the crack of couch cushions.

I like being held.

I'm also the middle child.

This is also my friend nick's theory on why I wear so many bracelets and heavy necklaces and anklets... I'm apparently binding myself inside my skin. Otherwise I might float away into the ether.

I woke up safely in my ski. Wedged between two goddesses and we set off on another adventure.
We got in a tuktuk and I sat in the middle.
We tools longboat cruise down the the river- through the floating market- feeding the zillions of catfish with loaves of bread which made me nearly vomit it was so gross.

Finally our longtail boat dropped us at The Temple of Dawn... My favorite temple by far at this point.
We wandered and then returned to Khaosahn where I started gettin sick... Yet again.

Maybe this time it was a defense mechanism so I could sleep through Cary and Laura's departure and not have to deal with the ripping, tearing pain of parting ways with them.

Either that or the antibiotics and various medicines I have been on this month have wiped my immune system out.

I slept for 2 days in Bangkok, waking up to eat provoking yogurt and bananas....

I made it up to the pool for an hour and closed my eyes only to open them and find hundreds of dragon flies hovering above me.

I erupted into Uncontrollable laughter as I always do when I see dragonflies.


I came back to my room and took 108 conscious breaths... Deep, full, healing, conscious, cleansing breaths with my feet up the wall following my mala I just bought at the temple of dawn.

I kept thinking about burning man and how in just a few days my PEOPLE would be joining at the playa temple to celebrate life and love and art.

Why am I here? I thought....

'Because you have to be somewhere.' a little voice inside me replied.

That was a good enough answer for me for some reason.

Tomorrow night I fly to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia for a night and then back on to Padang and I'll be back in the Mentawais in less then a week.

I can hardly wait to feel that air... The water... The essence of those magical islands.


I plan to detox my body with lots of clear clean ocean air, healthy foods, yoga, meditation, breathing & resting.

And then I go to Australia. Soul sister Liz is totally my people.

Without a doubt she and I will explore the Tonsai/Big Sur/Topanga//Venice/Santa Cruz sides of Sydney....

Woo hoo