home.

i am here.

about 9 days ago i left venice beach in a range rover driven by my best friend of 16 years.

some of my favorite people ever stood on the front porch stoop of the OM hOMe and howled as i pulled away towards LAX and whatever adventures lay ahead of me...

i can only think of a few moments in my almost 27 years of life that were as terrifying as that one.

what was i doing?


Last June - i rode my bike down broadway street after returning home from indonesia and finding out i was getting evicted from the apartment my ex-husband and i had shared for 3 years.

it was a total blessing.

i couldn't afford the $1300/mo. rent by myself... (although... don't get me wrong. i was NEVER actually alone there. 12 people had keys to that door and i loved it.)

but i knew, just as well as the universe in its divine wisdom knew... that it was time to move on.

so mikey, erin gomez & i set out on bicycles to find an OM hOMe... i figured wherever i decided to call hOMe, would end up housing many of my friends... but i had no idea it would end up becoming the famous vibe-six-seven Mowgli hOWWWse.

...and then all of a sudden, there i was 8 months later, driving away down Broadway with everything i owned packed into 2 suitcases.



... this became my theme song in the weeks leading up to my departure.

a series of crazy beautiful events led to me, josh & abby in a rental SUV stuck in deep mud in central california around 3am, freezing to death, trying to sleeping on top of several yoga mats and native american inspired blankets listening to copeland on repeat.

i will forever and always love copeland and consider it my soul's lullaby.

in fact, it is playing right this moment as i lie on the bed of my "hut" -- which should really be regarded as no less then a "driftwood dream-house"...
i
kid
you
not

i am perched on the edge of the most glorious island on earth.

from my bed, i see stunning green glass and rope lamps casting moon-like light across the tiki and soft white driftwood constructed elegantly to create the craftsman A-frame structure as crystal clear 85 degree waves crash in the dark beyond the glass doors propped open by conch shells.

as far as the ear can hear, there is no motor of any kind...

only the clicks and chirps of the jungle forest behind me & the deep sigh of my heart.

i am FINALLY here.


i forgot EVERYTHING.

i forgot how INDA it is here... (thats the indonesian word to describe something beautiful... and how appropriate that the country's name has the word INDA in it.)

it's too beautiful to put into words.

we pulled up at Awera - a friend's island resort...
between coasts so jam packed with palm trees they are literally bending and spilling over the edges.
TEEMING with life, this place.


i forgot how the water feels like silk... and the sand is so white... like the gecko on the ceiling in padang... and like the crabs that scuttle around...

i forgot that its so unbelievable, it is literally hard to believe.

it's divine here.

divine perfection.

how am i so blessed? what did i do to deserve this?

ainsley, john, birdie and i had dinner tonight...

ainsley and john own this paradise and birdie is the surf guide that lives here.

all beautiful, light-hearted, joyful people...

they all play guitar too... which is incredibly badass.

if these are really the people that are my reflection connection, then i am doing something RIGHT.

beeker is my new cuddle buddy...

she is a mentawai island monkey and i am in love with her.

before we went to sleep she was cuddling john as he lay on the floor of the kitchen.



i kept welling up with tears all day/night.

it's absolutely the dream of all dreams to be here.

(the generator shut off after i wrote that sentence last night.... so i will leave it at that....)

more to come after today... (which so far includes waking up to coffee, a gorgeous naked baby in the driftwood castle- his name is jonah, the son of my new friends tom and sas, who came to visit today.... then ainsley playing and singing me songs that she wrote that are absolutely insanely good.... practicing yoga in front of the waves as the monkey danced around.... diving in the silky warm ocean and then laying out in the sun alone... eating a beautiful lunch prepared by linda, the indonesian chef... and now sitting in the guest hut i am lucky enough to be staying in.... meditating and feeling blessed beyond words....)