Note to self: DO NOT read these entries at any point over the next few years when you want to take a break from studying.
I just read this one: http://aloveninja.blogspot.com/2011/09/ramai.html
And this one: http://aloveninja.blogspot.com/2011/10/wanderlust-must-trust-or-bust.html
They were actually just on my notepad on this computer from 2011 and I opened the notepad to paste a screenshot of some histology I was studying and BAM got sucked into my past.
I found myself sitting here with a gaping jaw... slightly shocked and embarrassed like a child who suddenly wakes up having sleep-walked into the living room and pissed themselves. Standing there confused about how they got here and what is happening right now.
What the hell happened to my mermaid scales? What happened to that barefooted gypsy queen with wanderlust oozing out of my heart and stars in my eyes?
How did I get here to Pomona - literally the armpit of Los Angeles. The real big shitty. Studying for the most intense thing I could ever do? Memorizing disease etiology, clinical findings, treatments for hundreds of diseases I had never heard of and couldn't pronounce until the moment I hear it and suddenly need to know it like it's something I've known my whole life.
This is no joke.
I'm in my first week of this program and I can't actually comprehend how all this information that I am staring at in a pile that is just enormous could possibly fit inside my head at the end of these two years.
I will actually BE a PA in two years. And then I will go back to taking adventures around the world and falling in love with humanity and squeezing the nectar out of this life like I used to.
So for now - I guess I just hit the pause button on everything and anything in my life and just bury my head into these books. Continue to try to drink water out of this fire hose...
BRB.
I just read this one: http://aloveninja.blogspot.com/2011/09/ramai.html
And this one: http://aloveninja.blogspot.com/2011/10/wanderlust-must-trust-or-bust.html
They were actually just on my notepad on this computer from 2011 and I opened the notepad to paste a screenshot of some histology I was studying and BAM got sucked into my past.
I found myself sitting here with a gaping jaw... slightly shocked and embarrassed like a child who suddenly wakes up having sleep-walked into the living room and pissed themselves. Standing there confused about how they got here and what is happening right now.
What the hell happened to my mermaid scales? What happened to that barefooted gypsy queen with wanderlust oozing out of my heart and stars in my eyes?
How did I get here to Pomona - literally the armpit of Los Angeles. The real big shitty. Studying for the most intense thing I could ever do? Memorizing disease etiology, clinical findings, treatments for hundreds of diseases I had never heard of and couldn't pronounce until the moment I hear it and suddenly need to know it like it's something I've known my whole life.
This is no joke.
I'm in my first week of this program and I can't actually comprehend how all this information that I am staring at in a pile that is just enormous could possibly fit inside my head at the end of these two years.
I will actually BE a PA in two years. And then I will go back to taking adventures around the world and falling in love with humanity and squeezing the nectar out of this life like I used to.
So for now - I guess I just hit the pause button on everything and anything in my life and just bury my head into these books. Continue to try to drink water out of this fire hose...
BRB.
